Tag Archives: ELL

Toy Fixing Up North

Posted on January 5, 2014 by stfleming

Q: How does an Eskimo child fix his toys? A: With igloo! Explanation: First of all, the term Eskimo is no longer used and is considered negative, pejorative, even racist.  The two main groups who live in the northern regions by the arctic … Continue reading →

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Picnicking

Posted on January 3, 2014 by stfleming

Q: What do you call someone who is afraid of picnics? A: A basket case! Explanation: Picnics are relaxed, outdoor meals, often eaten on a blanket or a picnic table.  When you go on a picnic you take a picnic basket– a basket … Continue reading →

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Untruthful Balloons

Posted on January 2, 2014 by stfleming

Q: Why can’t you take anything balloons say seriously? A: They’re always full of hot air! Explanation: “To take something seriously” is to believe what someone is saying.  “To be full of hot air” is to talk a lot without saying anything of … Continue reading →

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On Sale!

Posted on January 1, 2014 by stfleming

Q: Why did Michael’s grades drop after the holidays? A: Because everything was marked down! Explanation: The holidays refers to the time of the year between Thanksgiving and New Year’s Day.  It is a time when lots of people by many gifts for … Continue reading →

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Sentenced to …

Posted on December 31, 2013 by stfleming

Q: What happened to the man who shoplifted a calendar on New Year’s Eve? A: He got 12 months! Explanation: Shoplifters are people who steal from a store, usually something small (but shoplifters also steal larger items).  Shoplifting is against the law so, … Continue reading →

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Christmas Knitting

Posted on December 30, 2013 by stfleming

Q: Why are Christmas trees like bad knitters? A: They both drop their needles! Explanation: Christmas trees that are brought into the house often lose their needles; they fall off the branches as the tree dries (even if it gets enough water).  When … Continue reading →

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Wenceslas Pizza

Posted on December 29, 2013 by stfleming

Q: How does Good King Wenceslas like his pizzas? A: Deep and crisp and even! Explanation: “Good King Wenceslas looked out on the feast of Stephen.  When the snow lay round about, deep and crisp and even.” This is a well known … Continue reading →

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They’re Grrreat!

Posted on December 28, 2013 by stfleming

Q: What do snowmen eat for breakfast? A: Frosted Flakes! Explanation: Frost is frozen water vapor on a surface; it is kind of in between ice and snow.  Snowmen are made of snow, which is kind of like frost.  Frosted Flakes are a … Continue reading →

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Singing of the Apes

Posted on December 27, 2013 by stfleming

Q: What does Tarzan sing on Christmas? A: Jungle Bells! Explanation: “Jungle Bells” is an invented song name that reminds the listener of the song “Jingle Bells.”

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The Empty Sack

Posted on December 26, 2013 by stfleming

Q: How many presents can Santa fit in his empty sack? A: Only one.  After that it is not empty anymore! Explanation: The old empty sack trick!  This joke plays on the understanding of the words “empty” and “how many.”  The listener expects … Continue reading →

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