Tag Archives: jokes

Bowl me over!

Posted on April 19, 2013 by stfleming

Q: Where do football players go before the big game?  A: To the Toilet Bowl! Explanation: If someone says, “I gotta go!” that person means, “I have to go to the bathroom.”  Imagine someone saying that while squeezing their legs together.  Football … Continue reading →

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Elfabet

Posted on April 18, 2013 by stfleming

Q: What do elves learn in school?  A: The elf-abet! Explanation:  One elf (singular), two elves (plural).  Elves are mythological beings found in stories like The Hobbit or found at the north pole working for Santa Claus.  The alphabet is learned … Continue reading →

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Wet Melon!

Posted on April 16, 2013 by stfleming

Q: What do you call a wet fruit?  A: A watermelon! Explanation:  “Wet” is something that is liquid or has liquid on or in it.  For example, a towel gets wet when you use it to soak up water; the street … Continue reading →

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Happy Birthday!

Posted on April 15, 2013 by stfleming

Q: Why do we put candles on top of a birthday cake? A: Because it’s too hard to put them on the bottom! Explanation: Well, this is funny because the listener is expecting a real explanation that has to do with … Continue reading →

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Shake Well

Posted on April 12, 2013 by stfleming

Q: Why did John jump up and down before drinking his juice?  A: The box said, “Shake well before drinking!” Explanation:  Johnny was sooooooo confused!  When the box says, “Shake well before drinking” it is talking about the box, not the … Continue reading →

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Roll, Not Bounce

Posted on April 11, 2013 by stfleming

Q: What kind of balls don’t bounce?  A: Eye balls! Explanation:  Bounce is the way a ball goes up and down when thrown to the floor.  Tennis balls bounce.  Basketballs bounce.  Eyeballs… don’t bounce.  It would hurt too much if they … Continue reading →

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Make your (sea)bed

Posted on March 25, 2013 by stfleming

Q: Who keeps the ocean clean?  A: The mermaid! Explanation: A mermaid is a mythological creature who is part woman, part fish.  A “maid” is a person who cleans a house or a hotel.  This joke plays on the meaning of the … Continue reading →

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Cabbage Patching

Posted on March 20, 2013 by stfleming

Q: How did the farmer mend his pants?  A: With cabbage patches! Explanation: To mend a pair of pants, such as jeans, is to fix them.  If there is a hole in the knee you will need to patch the … Continue reading →

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Rule me this…

Posted on March 19, 2013 by stfleming

Q: Why was the king only a foot tall?  A:  Because he was a ruler! Explanation: A ruler is one who rules, that is, one who is in charge like a king or a president.  A ruler is also a stick … Continue reading →

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The Lettuce Wins!

Posted on March 18, 2013 by stfleming

Q: Why did the lettuce win the race?  A:  He was a head! Explanation: Lettuce is a green, leafy vegetable like in the picture.  When you buy lettuce you buy “a head” of lettuce.  The person who wins a race … Continue reading →

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