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Attorney Wear
Q: What do lawyers wear to court? A: Lawsuits! Explanation: There are many, many lawyer jokes; this is just one example. Lawyers go to court to represent plaintiffs (civil court), defendants (civil court and criminal court) and the prosecution (criminal court). When … Continue reading
Polished Bread
Q: What happens if you eat yeast and shoe polish? A: Every morning you will rise and shine! Explanation: Yeast is the ingredient in bread that makes it rise; if there is no yeast or the yeast is dead you will get … Continue reading
Posted in ELL, ESL, humor, Joke
Tagged bread, Disney, ELL, English, ESL, flatbreads, funny, humor, jokes, kids, kids jokes, morning, reading, rise and shine, shoe polish, writing, yeast
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Incognito
Q: What do you call a fake noodle? A: An Impasta! Explanation: Noodles, such as spaghetti noodles, can be called pasta. An imposter is a person who pretends to be someone else. So, a fake noodle is an “impasta” which sounds … Continue reading
National Cat Day
Q: What is it called when a cat wins a dog show? A: A CAT-HAS-TROPHY! Explanation: Today in the United States is National Cat Day! so a cat joke seemed appropriate. When someone (or some animal!?!) wins a contest like a … Continue reading
Please sir, I want some more
Q: Did you hear about the hungry clock? A: It went back four seconds! Explanation: To “go back for seconds” means to serve yourself more food from the kitchen, the serving dishes or perhaps the buffet line. And you only “go back for … Continue reading
Posted in ELL, ESL, humor, Joke
Tagged Charles Dickens, clock, ELL, English, ESL, food, for, four, funny, go back for seconds, humor, hungry, joke, jokes, kids, kids jokes, Oliver Twist, reading, seconds, serving dishes, teacher, time, writing
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Off Key
Q: What’s the difference between a guitar and a fish? A: You can’t tuna fish! Explanation: Tuna fish? No, tune – a – fish. You see, for a guitar to sound good, you have to tune it. A fish cannot be tuned… but … Continue reading
Light My Fire
Q: How do you make a fire with two sticks? A: Make sure one of them is a match! Explanation: This joke only works if you know what a matchstick is. If you have a match or a matchstick you can easily make … Continue reading
Posted in ELL, ESL, humor, Joke
Tagged ELL, English, ESL, fire, funny, humor, jack london, joke, jokes, kids, kids jokes, match, Matchstick, reading, sports, sticks, survival, To Build a Fire, writing
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Trout Trouble?
Q: Why can’t fishermen be generous? A: Because their business makes them sell fish! Explanation: This is a bad pun (are there good puns?)! Their business makes them ‘sell fish’ or shall I say “selfish.” Yes, sell fish sounds just like selfish but there … Continue reading
Hare Raising
Q: How do you paint a rabbit purple? A: With purple hare spray! Explanation: Hair≠ Hare but they sound the same. Hair is on your head and sometimes people use hairspray to keep their hair in place. Hare is an animal similar to … Continue reading
PB & J
Q: Why do bananas have to put on sunscreen before they go to the beach? A: Because they might peel! Explanation: A banana peel is the outside skin of the banana. Your skin can peel if you are in the sun and you … Continue reading
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